Who am I?
Well first and foremost I’m mommy or more accurately…”Mommy I am” to two kids. Daughter and son, which are teenagers now. What kind of mommy? a crazy mommy, but really crazy, about her kids.
One that for instance, never went on a holiday or trip without them (why? Believe it or not, I just didn’t want to) And don’t get me wrong, I’m actually not one of those women who have dreamt about being a mother and knew how to describe their house, husband, and what would the kids would wear on their birthdays since the age of three :)) I mean, I’ve always loved kids, but I loved my freedom and independence just the same. And so it happened that I became a mother at a relatively older age.
Furthermore, I never treated my motherhood as this extraordinary thing or anything worth a second observing but after many years of mothers I encountered, and noticed that many of my friends ask for my advice and surprisingly aren’t hurt by what I say but enjoy listening to my reflections, I started writing what was in my heart , and to most of my surprise mothers (and even fathers) commented about my writings enthusiastically and complemented my advice. And then I started to realize that I tapped into the ancient motherhood wisdom and whether I intended to or not – motherhood is a part of my being – and so the ” Mommy I’m” blog was born.
7 things I could say for my defense
1. Yes, I am mother. But no, I am not mother Teresa (I wish I was :)) I am no innocent holly being and definitely not all pure and naive, I am sure there are a few people I have hurt, or actions I wrongly took, and on perfect reflective days I enjoy thinking of myself as a fairly good person (relatively speaking) and try to bring a lot of happiness and good into my life and the lives of others. I constantly hope to do more and more.
2. I’m not a classic success story….Not in the business world nor in motherhood, in fact the amount of mistakes I have made in my life could fill a very thick book and for which I paid a fair and painful price :(( and for some I might pay in the future. But what can I say? A sucker like me, I’m still an optimist! And I believe Winston (Churchill) with all my heart, and his words “Success is the ability to skip from one failure to another without losing your enthusiasm” So I am skipping, enthusiastically. with a great childish grin. And when I really make it – I promise you would be the first to know.
3. I hold no degree, not BA or Ms. I’m no doctor, or coacher, not a mentor and I have no framed certificate to hang on my wall and make my mom proud. Classroom setting and educational structures never were my strong suit. and in fact I always say that the only way you can find me in a class room is if I’m allowed to be the…Teacher :))
4. Maybe I need Ritalin or some other soothing substance, because I defiantly suffer from the “Can’t sit still” syndrome, I talk a lot and fast, read a lot and quickly, and write a lot and quickly. This may sound nice but believe me, my closest friends and family don’t always do – in fact there are some days even my children, loved ones and my best friends (even if they won’t admit it) would prefer to change sidewalks if they see me running towards them with my familiar excited stride. On my defense I might say that I try (yet not always succeed) to balance myself, creating value for both my readers and listeners, and most importantly: change “victims” often :))
5. I am spiritual and practical, or more accurately: a very practical spiritualist. Curious, open minded, attentive, and also an investigator- But I have a hard time accepting something without at least trying it and understanding it…I know for a fact that our world holds more than meets the eye, and that there are some things (especially about mind and spirit) that you just have to accept, contain and perform without asking any questions, but I just know. …can’t seem to actually do. I find that the simply spiritual world to be difficult and on the long run, I respect processes but must have results, I have to DO, or at least try. I would love to be able to pray for days, meditate, Vipassana or any other spiritual exercise, but where…I can only dream. In the mean time I try, but not just try, really try. Maybe one day I will succeed, if not in this life time, maybe in the next.
6. I am a woman of question marks. I can’t seem to get along with exclamation point people. determined, know what’s best, what’s best for them, what’s best for me, those who pave the main roads, comfortable good shortcuts, those who have built structured formulas for success, those who have quick clear answers with a lot of exclamation points at the end. the kind of people who have a homogonous unified community (even if that community is filled with wonderful people with great intentions) Me? I put a question mark at the end of every sentence, even my own …I am always attracted to those who wonder, reflect, choose long answers, open, full of possibilities, those who choose to walk alone on a thorny path, who are willing to live with question marks and furthermore make it a way of living. In my late age (of 50 years) I am still not sure if it’s good or bad. what’s certain is that it is what it is, and this is the way I am.
But what is most important for me is:
7. I love, just like that, truly love!
people, women, children, flowers, birds, music, books,
scenery, yesterday, tomorrow, now, everything, even myself :))
I just love, effortlessly. I was born this way, gift of creation.
and excited, like a little kid, from the smell of the rain, sunrise in the morning,
the taste of a fresh tomato, first snow, day at the beach or the smell of spring
Just excited. from regular scenes, small gestures.
And most of the time I even succeed to not judge anything. not situations nor people.
So it happens that (almost) everything and (almost) everyone are always good and pleasant for me.
It may sound an untrusting cliché
The longer we chat on the web
And in every which way I speak to you
I hope you will come to find that the way I sign my posts
Is no other than the essence of my being
You too 🙂